I hate myself

I hate myself.

What I wan n wat I planned alwayz didnt turn up to my desire or didnt turn out at all..

Juz hate being myself

Can I pls be someone else who is so lucky enough?

~Happy Birthday Love~

To love happy 31st birthday. Hope all ur wish come true ya hehhee..

Thank also to all frens n family yg sanggup menjayakan the small birthday party although last min change location. Reali2 appreciate u all hehehe..Although ada glitch sikit but to  me small matter la. Dont blame anyone..

Birthday boy semoga cepat sembuh. Birthday boy sakit nk besar hehehe

~Last Day~

Today will be my last day of work.I feel I shld go on after being sabar for abt a year with this company. I tink I too patience. Every single month keep on giving my salary late sometimes up to two months n delay in paying CPF. Yesterday I was on Mc n today they give me termination letter cos main reasons I was on Mc but did not give valid Mc certificate.

So I dont wan to talk much. I dont give a damn. My last day shld be on the 9 June but I will not come tomolo and will come back to collect my pay nxt mth but no fixed date yet. OMG. Dh resign pun masih nk kena tunggu gaji bila… 

If I stay more longer all my bills will be piling up.

Wish me luck in new job hunting..

~Anugerah Band~

Went to Mediacorp to watch love performing yesterday. Love not himself yesterday. Poor ting he falls sick at the wrong timing. But its ok love u always the best in my heart although at times ‘cekik darah’.

Quite disappointing with Fatskunks performance. They can do much more better actuali. Wrong song make the whole tings looked so dull n bored. I wonder 50% sms n 50% frm judge. Do any one wanna vote.

Wat I can say ‘Sepakat membawa Berkat’ Berpijak Pd Bumi Yg Nyata.

Reali thumb up to X tech for their awaresome performance. I sing along with them throughout  their performance. That’s wat we call catchy enough. But who are me to comment me some sort of ‘makcik -makcik’ who give void deck comments…Watever..

~Batam Trip~

Monday Blue!! How I wish I can go holiday everyday. No need to think of anytink. Have a great weekend at Batam but did not manage to spend time berduaan2 with love. He so bz with his video shooting. But dh tugas kan.

Me manage to try the hotel facility. Went to their sauna. First time beb hehe. 15 mins pass n I reali cannot take it went I out of the sauna I was so red and sweating all over.

Planning to go another honeymoon with love but the money alwayz not enough so have to wait again.

~Can’t waittttttttt~

I juz cannot wait for dis wkend..Juz wan to relax myself n out of here.Although it juz a short gateway to Batam. I longed for holiday.

I’m in holiday mood now..

~Hate them~

I juz simply hate people who are big mouth. Think before you talk. Juz cannot understand why people see me diffrently esp hubby’ s fren. Dont want to mention their name here.

Juz because I ask hubby to go clubbing with me they make a big fuss over it. By saying hubby have change alot n ‘ME’ ME is the one who change him. Hey big mouth we went clubbing together n we didnt even drink ok. Juz when there to join the crowd. Esp for me who are a virgin clubber. Seriously at age of 26 I’m a virgin clubber. Lucky ting hubby is the one who i asked to accompany. I tink if other guys sure they make the hell out of it. Hey people mind ur own business. Think before your talk. If I hate that person mean I hate them to core.

~New Chapter~

Tomorrow onwards will be a new chapter in ma life. Will be on medication and KK Hospital will be my next second home and hope that I will not becoming nuts with all this regular check up. Went to KK appt today afternoon for the Fertility Test. Its a first time experience for me cos never in my life I was admitted to hospital nor went for check up. Was so scared. Butterfly in my stomach. Lucky hubby was so sporting to comfort me while he also having the same fear.

While waiting for our names to be called met hubby’s fren who also when for Fertility check up. This is their 2nd check up. They have been married for 2 1/2 years. We went from one room to the other room and met our doc. Oh my gosh its a male doc but lucky things a lady doc there as his partner heheehee. The female doc did a pack smear for me.(i donno how to spell ler) A very first time experince for me. Feel so uncomfortable and a bit pain at first. Then I was to take urine test cos my menses have been delay. Went out again and wait for the next appt date for hubby n me. I will have to come again on my 2nd day of menses for blood test that will be 10 days later after taking the menses pill. While hubby will have to come on 25 May to submit his sperm sample. And i will have to come again in June for my ultrasound scan. Thinking of the appt and all the annual leave that I going to take make me feel tired n sick.And of course the money matter. But what to do we have to work hard to get what we want. Only Allah knows how I feel when people keep on asking when will there be junior.

I once breakdown till I cried everyday in the loo. I cannot see preggy women or women pushing baby cart.I hope all dis will be end soon. Insyallah.

Pandan Muffin

Mind me this receipe is in Malay

Bahan-Bahannya
180 g mentega tanpa garam (unsalted butter)
140 g gula halus
2 biji telur gred A
80 ml susu segar
1 camca teh esen vanilla
220 g tepung gandum*
2 camca teh baking powder*(*disatukan dan diayak)
1 camca teh pandan paste
Sedikit coklat cip untuk hiasan (optional)Cara membuatnya

 

1. Putar mentega, masukkan gula dan putar hingga putih. Masukkan telur satu persatu dan putar hingga kembang. Masukkan esen vanilla dan putar lagi.
2. Perlahankan speed dan masukkan tepung berselang seli dengan susu cair hingga habis. Gaul rata. Akhir sekali masukkan pandan paste dan gaul rata.
3. Sudukan ke dalam acuan muffin kegemaran 3/4 penuh, tabur sedikit coklat cip dan bakar dalam oven yang telah dipanaskan pada suhu 175C selama 20 – 25 minit atau hingga masak. Bergantung pada oven masing2..
   

Baking Passion

I am not into baking but lately I juz simply cannot help myself. I feel like trying this and that so bake a simpla Pandan Muffin. Hubby fancy everythings that made from Pandan. After searching around the web found this receipe. I destroy the muffin by putting alot of icing on top. This is the first time I playing with icing. Love it so much but when it came to cleaning up. I felt like screaming. So gressy.